why saying "i'm there for you" is never enough

"I'm there for you"

"Call me anytime"

"My door is always open for you"

"You can talk to me"

Such kind words, are they not?

One suicide and everyone says these

Except just saying them

makes no difference.

Do you think a depressed human will walk up to you and say - "I'm depressed, dear friend, help me"

Having the courage, the consciousness to admit mental illness is not everyone's game.

And if they do, 

would you carry 

the responsibility of those kind words you said?

Those words 

Carry a lot of weight

A big claim. 

Those words mean

loving bruised battered hearts,

telling them to have hope when they can see only the end,

wiping tears away until your own hands taste like tears

To care the way you would 

for a loved one with a broken limb.

Being there for someone is not childs play

it's a tough task

A million times more difficult than caring for someone with a physical illness.

And what is worse than someone who says they are there for you

and then, actually, they are never there.

Don't make promises you cannot keep

claims you cannot heed

words that resonate with emptiness

false hope

Or say it, say you'll be there

And then - be there, for real.

Getting a job in UK - for Indian Anaesthetists

Over here, I am describing, step by step how you can get a job in the United Kingdom. This tutorial is for Indian Anaesthesiologists (Anaesthetists, as some of us like to call it). Trust me, no where else, on or off the internet, will you find this information spoon fed to you, in such a straightforward way. You're welcome.

There are mainly three routes you can use. Note (VERY IMPORTANT) that the common requirement for all these routes is clearing IELTS or OET.

Another important piece of information is that getting these jobs is all about building your CV. Your CV matters! Any extra degrees, courses, publications or presentations matter. So be sure to work on this.

ROUTE ONE - MTI - Medical Training Initiative

What this is - It is a scheme drafted by the UK government which allows "qualified" doctors from specific countries to come to UK for a period of two years to learn, earn and return to their home country. You will be sponsored by the Royal College of Anaesthesia, not the Trust employing you.

How to apply -

Step 1 - Email global@rcoa.ac.uk - saying that you want to apply for a MTI post along with your IELTS score and CV.

Step 2 - You will receive a reply in a few days (it takes time because they get many requests) asking you to fill in a form. 

Step 3 - You will be approached via email by different hospitals for interviews. 

Step 4 - if you clear the interview, you get the job. Simple. 🙂

Advantages -
1. Hands down, the quickest way.
2. Easy

Disadvantages -
1. You are placed at ST 3-4 level which is kind of like "final year resident and just freshly passed out after masters" level in India. So, if this level is unacceptable to you, this route is not for you.
2. Your Visa is for two years. Keep in mind, you can always re-apply for a new different Visa after two years. But, if you are looking for a longer first Visa, this is not for you.

ROUTE TWO - Royal College of Anaesthesia (RCoA) exam - FRCA Part1 / EDAIC 

Note that to clear FRCA part 2, the requirement is that you need to have worked in the UK. So, you cannot clear the entire exam (all parts) from India.

What this is - FRCA is the qualifying exam for Anaesthesia in the UK. Clearing the first step, allows you a chance to be sponsored by the NHS Trust employing you. Alternatively, you can clear EDAIC exam and follow the same steps. Clearing EDAIC, exempts you from appearing for FRCA part 1 (this is subject to change as per guidelines).

How to apply -
Step 1 - Go to FRCA/EDAIC website - https://www.rcoa.ac.uk/examinations or https://www.esahq.org/education/edaic/part-i-examination/registration-for-part-i-examination/ and apply for the exam.
Step 2 - Study hard and clear the exam.
Step 3 - Look for jobs online on websites - https://www.indeed.co.uk/ or https://www.jobs.nhs.uk/
Step 4 - Create your profile on https://apps.trac.jobs/
Step 5 - Apply for jobs and await for an interview call.
Step 6 - Clear the interview and get the job.

Advantages-
1. Your Visa will be for 5 years.
2. Your pay will be better than MTI route pay.

Disadvantages-
1. You have to pay for and study for the exam.
2. It takes longer to get to UK.

ROUTE THREE - PLAB

What is this - The PLAB test is for doctors who have qualified overseas and wish to practice medicine in the UK under limited registration. The test assesses your ability, as a doctor, to work safely as a senior house officer (SHO) in a UK NHS hospital.

How to apply -
Step 1 - Go to https://webcache.gmc-uk.org/ecustomer_enu/index.aspx and create your GMC login, by following the instructions over there.
Step 2 - You can view available dates and book under the 'My Tests' section.
Step 3 - Pay for, study for and clear both parts of PLAB.
Step 4 - Create your profile on https://apps.trac.jobs/
Step 5 - Apply for jobs and await for an interview call.
Step 6 - Clear the interview and get the job.

Advantages-
1. PLAB is a relatively simpler exam.
2. You get a Tier 2 Visa which means it is for 5 years.

Disadvantages -
1. You will posted at a level lower compared to if you clear FRCA, similar to MTI pathway.
2. The cost and studying that will go into the exam.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

There you go, the three main ways to come to UK. There may be a few more ways, but i assume you need massive connections and money for those. I do not know about those ways.
I admit this is not a comprehensive guide, just a simpler one. I am happy to answer any questions anyone may have. Post them down below.

Cheers~~

Good morning

Smile, my love

For sunshine has touched you

And that is nothing short of a miracle

Brim with gratitude 

At the prospects of a new day

Live well today, my love

For the sunshine has touched you 

Differences between government health care in India versus UK.

Availability of drugs and rationality of drug use is discussed by a pharmacist every day. They don't get sudden warnings saying "no more adrenaline available, you need to prescribe". And in the event that something is not available, it is discussed and a solution is sought.

The NHS staff have many perks in daily life.

The seniors work. Enough said.

You are not expected to stand when a senior comes in or to offer them your seat. Every one is well mannered to each other.

All treatments are protocol based.

Nobody is over worked. If doctors are less, they just hire more doctors to fill in the gaps. Existing ones don't have to work extra.

There is a lot of planning and meetings AND execution, that's done.

The few pros of the Indian system-

The flexibility to treat the patient your way is attractive.

Overworking does sharpen your skills. 

change of clothes

How cold hearted you are

To forget me

As easy as a change of clothes

a girl's heart

Is like a hard boiled egg

Might take a while breaking the tough shell

But inside she's soft, easily bruised

Once you leave a mark, you'll be there forever

Handle gently

Never be careless with a girl's heart

A Fortnight In London - Food Edition

Never have I ever cooked on a regular basis before but I love cooking. Thanks to Nigella Lawson and Masterchef Australia, I think we all end up getting theoretical knowledge. I love the control cooking gives me over the nutrient and quality content, hygiene and most importantly, the taste AND consistency (presentation has never been a big one for me)!

You know, some us like our rice "khula khula", some of us like it a bit "geela".

Now that I cook my own food, I've been struggling with portion control. I make too much and eat too much. And I feel like I should eat without much thought to "keep my immunity strong" since I am working on the front lines in this "Corona war". Also the fact that gym (which i love) is shut, does not help.

Any tips on portion control in this situation?

Here are snaps of some of the things I cooked in my first week in London.

The humble "upma". Could not believe how great this turned out. Learnt the skill of roasting semolina in ghee.

Spinach and Cheese Sandwich with Boiled Egg. Guilty confession - i consumed a whole packet of British Cheddar in one week. It was that good.

Chicken Masala with Toasted Bread. Again, this came out so amazing. Thanks to "Everest Chicken Masala" i brought from home. Confession - I fought with my mom because she was giving me too much "kitchen stuff" and my suitcase was out weighing permissible limits. But man, am i glad to have brought all those masalas!

One of personal favourites - Fried Chowli Masala. So simple, so delicious.

Chicken Fried Rice! Ok, this was delicious but for cooking Chinese, it's essential for the rice to be "not sticky", and I have yet to learn how to make "khula khula" rice.

Egg Paratha with Aloo Rassa. A surprisingly addictive combination. Going to making this again and again.

Dal Fry with Vegetable Pulao and Dahi. Personal favourite. 

That's a pot of Butter Chicken sizzling away...

Palak Mushroom with Chapati. The best way to have your greens in my opinion.

And occasional disasters like these - burnt banana bread.

Cheers~~

My grandfather's eyes

Priceless
Ancient and wise
Warm, like aged wine
There is something calming about old eyes, 
with their wisdom, depth and cataracts.

-
Rx Dream

A fortnight in London - the first

Started with the overnight layover at Mumbai airport. Spent it saying goodbyes to dear friends, drinking over priced coffee (Rs. 500 for one cup, to be specific) and gazing at planes flying off into the world. Thankful for the mask and hand sanitizer I had.

Onto the nine hour plane journey. Here's a mandatory sky click from the window seat. If you look closely, you'll see a snow capped mountain (is that what it is?)

This is how the United Kingdom welcomed me. 

  Let the adventure begin! English breakfast! Turned out to be too much for just me, but super yum!

                                                            

Cherry blossom season starting out, the Hammersmith bridge, pretty streets and houses - London already has my heart in fifteen days. Silent roads, peaceful walks - courtesy the Covid crisis.  Might I add that all these photographs are from me running essential errands, not unnecessarily frolicking around town.

And views like these, again courtesy the Corona virus.

                                           

Experiencing (and joining in) warm applause for NHS workers fighting at the front line in this crisis. Excited about starting work soon. Or may be not? But mostly, despite the crisis and the fact that i'm an Anesthetist and Intensivist (meaning I will be working super close to the infected lives) - i'm looking forward to work and to put my skills to use.

White magnolias, forever the girl who loves flowers 

How stunning does the reflection of trees in the water look...

Overcast, mild rains and the sun too! Suits me just right.

My hospital entrance <3

That's about it, the first fifteen days here in a few photographs. Hoping it only gets better. Cheers, as Londoners would say it.

Fuck ego

Because sitting with the ocean before me
and you beside me
your head on my shoulder
your hair against my cheek
your arm around me
is worth 
losing my ego, my self respect
and all those high humanly things.
Me, i just want love,
fuck ego.

Yours truly,
forever,
the hopeless romantic,
the sucker for love.

-Rx Dream

Most precious

How come
you don't want it?
I don't understand,

to hold hands and walk on the sea shore with someone who loves you. 

Is there anything more precious?

-

Rx Dream

Lost tears

You say
My tears have no meaning
I cry every other day

And I almost believe that's true
That my tears are but salt water,
nothing more.

But darling,
can't you see
it is not my tears 
that happen everyday
it's your betrayal.

-Rx Dream

He was right

She didn't know
her heart was 
so weak
like a thin sheet of ice
just some pressure away from snapping into pieces

She didn't know
she could be
so foolish
like a child asking for ice-cream when he has a bad cold

She didn't know
she could be 
so hopeless

She didn't know
it was possible for her 
to be treated
the way he treated her.

Turns out 
he was right,
he showed it to her,
she didn't know much
after all.

- Rx Dream